How More Beautiful You Are

after Kotaro Takamura

How more beautiful you are, with every veil,
Every adornment, shed.

Your body, by the wash of years refined;
Boundless, like a meteor.

Your soul, insubstantial to vanity or scandal,
Moving swiftly, as desire.

How long, centuries? Before this consummation
Into woman?

There, wrapped in your silence, it is as if you were
Creation’s first triumph.

Ah, sometimes my heart leaps in me amazed:
How more beautiful you are.


38 comments:

  1. The Chieko poems chart the Japanese artist Kotaro Takamura's life with Chieko Naganuma, an iconoclastic woman artist - their attraction, separation, marriage, her illness and death, and ultimately, the power of love.

    My adaptations complement the work of talented translators - such as Leanne Ogasawara, Paul Archer and John G. Peters - to whom I owe great thanks.

    Short link - http://bit.ly/s4howmore

    ---
    This labor is also being done to highlight the relief efforts of the Red Cross, and other agencies, in the wake of the 2011 earthquake and tsunami in Japan. Please help if you can...

    • US - Text REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10
    • Canada - Text ASIA to 30333 to donate $5

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  2. Cheiko poems! This takes my breath away. :D

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  3. "How more beautiful you are"--that is such a good line, truly. That "more" is what makes it, for me!

    It makes me think of Marvin Bell--"You are not beautiful, exactly. You are beautiful, inexactly."

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  4. This blog is a generous offering to the world, Sam. Love at first read.

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  5. And how more beautiful this lyric, Sam. I love the tenderness in your work. xxxj

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  6. sweet sentiments.

    well done.


    Check out our potetry potluck week 38 today,
    With Kavita/Olivia starring the show.
    First time participannts feel free to share 1 to 3 old poems or random poems in case you don’t have anything fitting our theme (inspired by a song).
    Come on it nOW.
    We love your talent!
    Hugs
    xoxox

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  7. "How More Beautiful You Are" has seen new life, as Peter Mburu and others on Twitter have dedicated it as a tribute to Wangari Maathai, Kenyan environmental and political activist, who won the Nobel Peace Prize. Maathai died of complications arising from ovarian cancer while receiving treatment at a Nairobi hospital on 25 September 2011. I am honoured for this composition to be dedicated thus.

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  8. check out poets rally today,

    http://promisingpoetsparkinglot.blogspot.com/

    share a free verse, make poetic friends, cheers.

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  9. How lovely - your body washed by years refined--especially appreciated by those - you know-washed by years! K.

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  10. "with every veil,
    Every adornment, shed"

    I love this imagery---the removal of layers.

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  11. Your body, by the wash of years refined...nice....i think that many a woman only looks better with age....as if you were creations first triumph...another really great line...

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  12. A beautiful opening line!

    How more beautiful you are, with every veil,

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  13. Beautiful language, precision of meaning and thought define this poem. The ineffable spoken, the depth of unreachable emotion plumbed. Your poetry dazzles with every read. I am undone.

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  14. These are words every woman likes to hear . You write them with such ease and expertise.

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  15. You have captured the depth of a relationship in a way that expresses a long abiding love, a deep and sensual physical attraction unaltered by years or change. This is really, really beautiful, Sam.

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  16. The flow of the words in tenderness befitting of a fine lady 'whose body washed of years of refine' How brilliantly crafted Sam!

    Hank

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  17. I love your adaptation, his Lemon Elegy broke my heart. Gorgeous poetry as usual.

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  18. Sam, I must say, this is what my husband thinks about me at 55. I mean, he's not a poet, but I actually blushed when I read it, and I'll read it to him later as well... he has loved me with an extra 50 pounds, just out of the "Bin," my pencil-thin but still curvy body today, even with its sags from birthing, the stretch marks...

    A lovely appreciation of a mature woman. You have my vote, baby! Peace, Amy BL (and I think you'll like this one...)
    http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/06/27/skinny-dipping-adults-only/

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  19. There, wrapped in your silence, it is as if you were
    Creation’s first triumph.

    Love these lines!
    A beautiful piece and moving tribute.

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  20. beautiful is an understatement here, tender and timeless.

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  21. "Your body, by the wash of years refined;
    Boundless, like a meteor. " words every woman longs to hear or at least feel. Beautiful poem Sam!

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  22. A wonderful love poem! My favourite of all its compliments is, 'Your soul, insubstantial to vanity or scandal'.

    Congratulations on its being used in tribute to Wangari Maathai. A great honour, yes, which is surely deserved.

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  23. Having this week learned that less is more, your more tells me otherwise! I only wish that my body were refined by the wash of years.

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  24. And love is timeless...

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  25. Gorgeous, absolutely!
    If I were a woman...

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  26. "How long, centuries? Before this consummation
    Into woman?"

    Amazing lines... binding creation and beauty.

    Blackprint Poet
    www.blackprintpoetry.blogspot.com

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  27. Every time I think I've read your best work,Samuel, you surprise me with something better. This is timeless, truly something that should be read forever, as long as people have words.

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  28. First line - soft and personally touching

    "how beautiful you are"

    Do you know how lovely this is? Really -- how many times have we ever had someone say that to us -- not enough!

    Love your writing -- lyrical touching and speaks of eternal love!

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  29. That refrain line is compulsive reading. Another perfect poem.

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  30. I think love does that -- makes us more beautiful to one another over time, beyond the physical to the soul, bleeding through to make the body timeless and treasured, indistinct from the person, the heart, the whole. Your work too is timeless and beautiful!

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  31. So romantic, filled with the deepest type of love, not lust. The words wash over the reader in gentle splashes of beauty.
    This is a stunning read Samuel.

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  32. a gentle poem of love and connection

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  33. oh my..i just love this sam...such tender, real, intense and honest emotions..and i won't start citing lines..it is in the lines..but it's more the overall feel that makes this poem so fantastic

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  34. Thanks for all the kind comments!

    This is now the title poem of an ebook containing a collection of love poems (and nothing but love poems), and can be found at this link - "How More Beautiful You Are" - for Amazon Kindle, and Kindle for iOS and Android (you'll need the free Kindle app from the App Store or Google/Android Play Store).

    If you've read the ebook, and like it, please leave a comment on the Amazon review page!

    Thank you so much!

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  35. Sam, so romantic, gentle. Like the words of an adoring lover watching her bathed in candlelight. You have a beautiful soul, my friend. Peace, Amy

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  36. Such a soothing feel to your words, could sing them out with the birds.

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Thanks so much for visiting my site, I'm grateful you've taken the time to read. If you liked this selection, you can download a sampler of (or buy!) my books at the following links...

- Sonata Vampirica
- Sonnets from the Labrador
- How More Beautiful You Are
- Tango Desolado
- War and Ablution

...And, if you can, please leave a rating at Amazon.com. It's easy, and it does help a lot.

...Thank you!